After the birth of my first child, I remember feeling this incredible amount of pressure. I didn’t know which way to turn. Everything that I knew had done a complete 180 and everything that I thought it was going to be was nothing like what I was experiencing. I literally didn’t know it was going to be that hard. I remember the term ‘mum brain’ being branded about like a badge of initiation, as though it was funny, somewhat normal. I couldn’t think straight and I started doing Sudoku Puzzles, anything to try and get my mind focused and concentrating again. I made a commitment to myself; I would return to my centre.

“i never knew that only love could hurt like this' ' is an ode to the many times I have had to find a way to put my children to one side so that I can focus on finding myself again. In all of the chaos, there is still a person who is creative, adventurous, curious and playful. There is a myth about mothers that in order for us to be good at it, we must be self-less and place our own selves to one side at almost all times. I don’t see it that way. The best thing I can do is show my children that honouring your-self is an act of pure love. This is where we find the balance, even if it is somewhat temporary. We must come back to ourselves again and again.

Read more about Charmaine Beneyto.